I find school really obnoxious lately, Mrs. Seefeld was gone for her step fathers funeral and we had a lousy sub so the two most obnoxious girls yelled at everyone to shut up everyday. I was friends with one of them but I didn't know she was such a mean person. It's pretty bad when I think your a jerk. Sure I dislike people but I don't think a lot of people are jerks. Just Greg! Hate him. Anyways at Miranda's house with Shelia I stumbled over everything. I tracked dirt into her house and then the milk I got ninth period spilled in my bag. It was just another one of those days. Shelia said she might take me to a baby shower and then to the sale at Herbergers. We'll see. Until then I should probably announce that I think my coworker is pregnant. Mom does too, about 5 months and she's younger than I am. Thank god I have some smarts and didn't ask her, it be like telling her she's fat. I want to bad though. Oh and I broke a glass clock at work. Who puts a glass clock in the nursery?.. I've been spending a lot of time in the library this semester, I really enjoy going in during ninth period and so far I've read TWO books. Ok so it was not hard reading but they were at least a hundred pages. That and the last couple of days have been so so, Alex Steen always comes in the library. He is such a pussy, he gives me these looks I cannot stand, I find it really hard to tolerate his presence lately. He knows I go to the damn library if he doesn't want to look at me go away, I'm there first I am not leaving.

To get further along since I last posted I should probably talk about recent events. I found a gray hair yesterday! I almost had to call my mom in the middle of class to tell her but just ended up taping it down to show her later. I also stalked Krsitens boyfriend, I couldn't help myself he was crying. I think they broke up..I hope they broke up. That crazy woman should not date, who knows what would happen if they reproduced...

Oh buggers I have to go back to class, I hate it when I loose track of time. TTML talk to myself later...

The Speech

I just gave my speech at the girly scout convention. A bunch of girls set up booths about different things. I don't know how long I talked but my mom didn't seem to thrilled after I was done. I asked her if she was disappointed and she just said she was tired. I can never get a strait answer with her, she's always sugar coating it to make me feel better. Miranda should be proud to here that I'm selling community day tickets with her mom though:). I may have something to report about that tomorrow but I'm sure it'll end with a second date lol.

Oh woh is me. I was thinking last night while preparing my speach and realised it's going to be in a gym. Meaning that there would be a lot of people. I wish I wouldn't have put it off till last minute so I could go to the play with Kaitlin. I have to explain to girls my trip to New York with pictures..I didn't take any. So I searched facebook for some of the other girls photos and luckily there were a few. Thank god it's friday that's all I have to say

Actually I have more to say now
I returned a jazz band folder and met the band teacher..I think he's crazy. He babbled on for 5 minutes and gave me a free coupon book..weird.

Sir Mix-a-lot

I left early from lunch again, I could not handle there talk about cute boys and girly drama. I headed to web design since there happens to be no class at the time (thank god) and started my assignment. I went to record the song but didn't hit record so I sat through a 5 minute song oblivious. I ended up doing versions of baby got back and had to sit through vanilla ice and screamo. Recording took the whole class period so I left and dragged myself to chem and then psych and finally math. This is where it gets intresting. So I left for the computer lab to complete my project I didn't finish and was almost done except for beeping out a word. That word happened to be 'horny' and I could just not bleep out that word. I finally gave up and asked one of the other teachers, sadly he was not framiliar with Theiges's teaching style. So he took out my headphones to find the word and repeated horny horny horny over and over to the people in there and then finally he did get it except it was more like me so bleeep horny. It was one of the most embarressing thing since I acidentally asked Shultz if his mom was an element..sigh damn social skills

I think I am supposed to be writing about the walrus right now in english class for our literary critisim paper. I can't consentrate though because of the Bauch music the sub is playing. I got my Wii last friday finally and got animal crossing and outdoor challenge! My mom got some scuba diving game and we borowed the Wii Fit game from my aunt. I'm 20! I've been trying pretty consistently to get the hang of the remote during my sessions on Animal Crossing but I always end up falling in holes. In Wii Sports I really like tennis though! Back to the present, all I can say about Miller's class is that I can see the subs bra and her three back roles which is discusting, it amazes me how fat people let themselves get. Luckily for me I sit in the back. I got here two minutes early today and there were a few amazed faces to say the least, I've only been on time three times to third period and I can have the whole class confirm it. There have been times I have been ten minutes late to class! I am so lazy I sometimes decided to change into my clothes for tomorrow the night before so I don't have to wake up early to put them on, how horrible is that? You have no idea how long it takes me to put on a shirt in the morning when I'm half asleep. Though I am sure to have more to say later throughtout management I will end in this class while I'm still having a neutral day. Hopefully breakfast will be better lately Smith has been craby about our eating habits around computers. Have no idea why though, the doghnuts didn't seem that bad...

Valentines School Day

I know today is going to be a bland one. Valentines day happens to be one of my least favorite holidays after Thanksgiving and Easter. Valerie was nice enough to give me a kissogram although it was quite embarressing since I had no idea it was coming..and in Miller's class of all classes. Maybe at the end of the day I will have more to say but so far I don't see any boys in tights or girls in valentines underwear so my day is hopefully going well..on to management

I like writing to myself as if someones listening..

Personally why I write on this I don't know. I don't really want anyone to read it and it serves little purpose other than the constant reminder that I am a lonely little nobody. Everyday I walk hall to hall to my depressing classes where no one seem to want to be but me and I sit friendless and daydream my way through another American high school students day. Not to say that a high school experience is anything like mine. I noticed people tend to forget about the crafts classes associating them with art and instead taking those, also I believe management is for the popular people and and webdesign is for sophomores. Why I picked these classes I will never know, I seem to always choose the worst path. I don't even pass any of my friends in the hallways it is so bad. I get to hang out with Kaitlin after school though, one of my only meager interactions with my past social life. (if you could call it that) Now my social life is the boy crazy teeny boppers I sit with at lunch, the really shy girl, Elizabeth which wont shut up about video games and some squirel..and kirby, Mary:(, and Chelsea a girl in my geometry class. Even with all this variety:( of new people it seems it's all down to boys. I don't like talking about relationships and drooling over hot people. People aren't that attractive anyways. Men and women have terrible features that I think are down right discusting, private parts should be covered at all times, it's gross and I don't want to see it or talk about it. I can barely stand my own! Saying this really goes against what I wear and show though, by definition I wear revealing shirts and low waisted jeans and let me tell you know one wants to see my white ass or boobs. I do admit I like to look down at my breast occasionally..cough cough

I'll end this post on two good points for now..until I write again. FAIRWELL!!

I am sitting in the library after a two day leave from school. On monday I stayed home sick and on tuesday I had a eye appointment. My eye appointment went fairly well, I have minimal problems with my left eye but my right eye is getting worse. Supposedly I have a blood vessel on my optic nerve and could go blind. That just adds to the pleasure of my ongoing day. Suprisingly my ongoing cold is doing well too, although I can't tell with the 2 pills I took and the snort of nasel spray.. By the way I tried that Airborne tablets made by a school teacher they are discusting. Who knew lemon lime could taste like herbs. I would write more but I'm lazy..yawn..thank goodness I'm in management, I think I'll take a nap.

Neutral Moment!

You won't see many of these on here and if you do they are about something negative but I have wonderful news! I got featured twice in web design and won one of them. Also my new acquaintance formerly know as Elizabeth but who's name is actually Jason stood up to the obnoxious girl I call Butch. She was making fun of him and he goes "suck my dick!" and she freaks out. Now this is not the type of kid you would expect to hear that from, I would call him the son of Cher and Austin Powers. After he said it though he would've backed down but of course I stood up for him. I told her if I had a dick I would have her suck it too. It was a beautiful moment. *tear* Sadly I accidentally let out I know a bit about video games and now he won't shut up! By the way this is the same kid that watches Kirby and karate chops at his computer..sigh a once nuetral event turned itself into a negative once again.

MANAGEMENT

Right at this minute I am writing about Management while in Management. My teacher Mrs. Smith is the most pathetic teacher. She has no control over her class and people leave all the time with no permission. If I was to leave right now she would not care, if I was to tell her I was going to kill myself she would not care. I'm not saying I would kill myself obviously but really you don't ignore something like that. There are advantages of being in Mangement though, for example if I brought in a soft drink and muffin and set it on this laptop she would not care. If I text openly in class she would not care. I've taken a call in this class and she told the class to stay quiet for me. It was akward because of all the popular kids that are in this class. From this paragraph you can tell that Mrs. Smith is an uncaring person, she refuses to take responsibility and is downright unorganized. As of this moment I just got a text from my north friend Emily..Smith did not care. To explain my involvment with someone from north is quite obvious. In most cases I would not even meet someone from North but I work with her in the Hope Nursery which suprisingly I enjoy doing. Even though it would seem that I would do downright awful with children it just so happens I do have more expeirence than the average whipper snapper. My patients for writing is slowly deteriating so I'm going to wrap up this post with..The End

To explain my eager outlook on life could go on forever. But really what is the past but a mistake? The present is really the important part at this point, or in my case I don't want to look back on the resent past and recall my horrendous mistakes. So saying that I should start in the beginning of the new semester. I think I'll use everyday I blog as a day to explain one class of the day because obviously I have a lot to bitch about.

ENGLISH

As a class schedule goes mine is by far one of the worst. I start my day late to third period(late everyday this semester except twice) in English with Mr. Miller. He jokes and makes a fool of himself and everyone but me laughs hysterically. Have you ever noticed that very few comedians have physical attractiveness? It's because humor is used as a barrier like being the tough guy in elementary school or the book worm in college. Only ugly people and people with low self-esteem use humor in my opinion. Who knows what triggered these defense mechanisms in Mr. Miller and myself but obviously his seemed to be directed towards a positive outlook while mine lacks any enthusiasm. Though my reason for being so down has to do with my families genes and not so much an external factor. I would rather blame it on my childhood trauma. Children should have a stable home structure not one with moving and fighting parents. People have no idea what goes on in a child's critical learning process. I'm sure I will have relationship problems for the rest of my life now but then again who said I was going to get involved anyways?...

Description of Chelsea

This blog is going to be very difficult. I don't care if anyone reads this, personally I am only writing this so I can look back and laugh at myself. To describe who I am in a very clear manor one must need to know I have no humility when it comes to blogging. I have unlimited knowledge about my inner retardation. I have been to a number of shrinks and have learned quite a bit about myself. It all started with my parents Jennifer Oney and Ronald Kaiser. From my mother I got my lack of self confidence, self image issues and messy habits. From my father I received small boobs, a small butt, horrible outlook on life, sharp tongue, rude comments and depression. Thankfully I was lucky and the pansy genes were not passed down to me from my father. Fortunatly because my mother is heavier and I am extremely scared of getting large myself I am constently watching my weight and really care what other people thing of me, which can be either a negative or positive..but in all cases it is a negative. I've used humor my whole life to sheild people from seeing my true colors. Most people don't find depression to be an attractive quality in fact depression makes a person look downright unapprochable. In fact that is exactly what it does, people with depression tend to seperate themselves from there peers for quite a period of time. Usually this means a lack of social skills and low self-esteem. This describes me fully I had extreme depression in my younger years and sepperated myself from my friends and family. Ever since then I have unable to really make close friends, because of how unattached I am and how my depression manufests itself into anger and negative behavior. This probablly resulted because of my move to Fargo, North Dakota in the second grade. It was a hard move, at the time I was attached to my father and leaving Crookston, Minesota made it so I only saw him in the summer. Since then I bearly ever talk to my father or his side of the family. Clearly from this passage it should be noted that I am an extreme attention seeker, which is why I should not be writing this. Even though I have no problem with exploiting my personal information all over the internet I do have problems with actually dealing with the results writing something like this would have on anyone reading this. So please don't mention it or feel bad for me if you do stumble upon this..which I doubt anyone will.